{"id":7080122,"date":"2026-11-13T21:06:04","date_gmt":"2026-11-13T21:06:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/accountants4yourbusiness.co.uk\/?p=7080122"},"modified":"2026-11-13T21:06:04","modified_gmt":"2026-11-13T21:06:04","slug":"how-a-book-about-group-conflict-reminded-me-about-taijiquan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/accountants4yourbusiness.co.uk\/?p=7080122","title":{"rendered":"how a book about group conflict reminded me about Taijiquan"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div id=\"\">\n<p class=\"article-meta\"><span class=\"posted-on\">Posted on<\/span> <time class=\"article-time published\" datetime=\"2026-11-13T13:29:20+01:00\" itemprop=\"datePublished\">November 13, 2026<\/time><span class=\"article-meta-separator\"> | <\/span><\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<div id=\"\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am currently reading <a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0dCGGYme\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker<\/a>* with my book club. The book is about conflict in groups. That interested me, because most books about conflict and communication are about one-on-one situations. And as an internal martial artist myself, the title made me curious, too.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image aligncenter size-medium\"><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0dCGGYme\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\" noopener\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/The-Art-of-Fighting-Pirya-Palker-300x300.png\" alt=\"book: The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker\" class=\"wp-image-3260\" srcset=\"https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/The-Art-of-Fighting-Pirya-Palker-300x300.png 300w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/The-Art-of-Fighting-Pirya-Palker-1024x1024.png 1024w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/The-Art-of-Fighting-Pirya-Palker-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/The-Art-of-Fighting-Pirya-Palker-768x768.png 768w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/The-Art-of-Fighting-Pirya-Palker.png 1080w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Then I was surprised to find a section that felt so much like Taijiquan. It\u2019s about preparing your body for a fight, and it touches on several aspects of Taijiquan.<\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">How to prepare your body for a fight<\/h2>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Priya Parker writes that experienced conflict facilitators prepare themselves much like high-performance athletes. For example, she asked <a href=\"https:\/\/prentishemphill.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Prentis Hemphill<\/a>, a facilitator, somatic coach and therapist who works with conflict and the body. Here is their list:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Preparing your body for a fight<br \/>1. The body has all sorts of reactions. Get ready for them. (\u2026)<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>2. Practice being in a regulated body. (\u2026)<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>3. Relax. (\u2026)<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>4. Take a breath, give it a shake. (\u2026)<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right wp-block-paragraph\"><cite><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0dCGGYme\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker, pp. 162-164<\/a>*<\/cite><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">All of that makes sense generally. And all of it is something we do in Taijiquan. But what really stood out to me was the exact wording of point 3.<\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">A relaxed body is the most powerful body<\/h2>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Taijiquan is often not seen as a martial art, because it is so slow and relaxed. So I was fascinated when I read how Hemphill talks about relaxing before a fight:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>3. Relax. When I [Priya Parker] asked Hemphill how they prepare for moments of heat, they paused and thought for a while. \u201cI get really, really relaxed,\u201d they finally said with a laugh. \u201cA relaxed body is the most powerful body we have. Because from a relaxed body you can do anything. But from a tense body or bracing body, you have a smaller set of moves you can make,\u201d they said. A \u201clistening body,\u201d Hemphill said, is \u201cflexible and moving.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right wp-block-paragraph\"><cite><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0dCGGYme\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker*, p. 163<\/a><\/cite>\n<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Wow, doesn\u2019t that sound like a quote from a Taijiquan book? There are actually two things in this paragraph: being relaxed and having a listening body. In Taijiquan, we have names for both: S\u014dng and T\u012bng J\u00ecn. Let\u2019s look at them in detail.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">S\u014dng: relaxation without softness<\/h3>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Being relaxed is what Taijiquan is all about. Even people who don\u2019t practise Taijiquan know that. And that is exactly the core of Taijiquan: to stay relaxed and slowly drill the fight moves. The Chinese word for that is S\u014dng:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Song: relaxation, loosening, letting go of unnecessary tension.<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right wp-block-paragraph\"><cite><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0iepS8SK\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Taijiquan &amp; Qi Gong Dictionary by Angelika Fritz<\/a>*<\/cite>\n<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">However, being relaxed doesn\u2019t mean being a couch potato. Actually, there is a more precise Chinese term: F\u00e0ng S\u014dng (literally \u201clet go\u201d and \u201cloose\u201d).<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Fang Song: to loosen the body. Relaxation without softness.<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right wp-block-paragraph\"><cite><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0iepS8SK\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Taijiquan &amp; Qi Gong Dictionary by Angelika Fritz<\/a>*<\/cite>\n<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So you want to be relaxed, but still keep your internal structure. It\u2019s the same when you go into a fight: you want to be relaxed, but still have your values and your backbone.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">T\u012bng J\u00ecn: the listening body<\/h3>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The second part of the quote is about the \u201clistening body\u201d. In Taijiquan, that is T\u012bng J\u00ecn, listening energy:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Ting Jin: the ability to accurately listen to\/feel\/interpret the energy and strength of another person.<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-right wp-block-paragraph\"><cite><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0iepS8SK\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Taijiquan &amp; Qi Gong Dictionary by Angelika Fritz<\/a>*<\/cite>\n<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">This is a more advanced skill. Relaxation is something you can see immediately, even as an outsider. Listening is more subtle. You can feel and experience it in push hands or when testing applications. <a href=\"https:\/\/qialance.com\/what-is-pushing-hands-tui-shou\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">No wonder push hands is also called \u201clistening hands\u201d.<\/a><\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Listening to a partner\u2019s energy in push hands is close to listening to the other person in a conflict.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image aligncenter size-medium\"><a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0dCGGYme\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\" noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/preparing-for-a-fight-300x300.png\" alt=\"Preparing your body for a fight from the book &quot;The Art of Fighting&quot; by Priya Parker\" class=\"wp-image-3259\" srcset=\"https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/preparing-for-a-fight-300x300.png 300w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/preparing-for-a-fight-1024x1024.png 1024w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/preparing-for-a-fight-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/preparing-for-a-fight-768x768.png 768w, https:\/\/qialance.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/11\/preparing-for-a-fight.png 1080w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\"\/><\/a><\/figure>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Reading that part of the book made me wonder how I can bring Taijiquan principles even more into my daily life. Not only when I am physically moving, but also in conversations and conflicts with the people around me.<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And to go even further, I started thinking about group conflicts in Taijiquan. We usually learn and practise in groups. There is sometimes tension between people. Actually, that is what my own novel <a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0cgzH6TX\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">Push Hands<\/a>* is about: tension in a Tai Chi group.<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So if you\u2019re curious, give <a href=\"https:\/\/link.amazon\/B0dCGGYme\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"sponsored noopener\">The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker<\/a>* a read. And maybe think about the group conflicts you are in right now. How could you bring a little S\u014dng and T\u012bng J\u00ecn into them?<\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Happy Qi!<br \/>Angelika<\/p>\n<p><!-- VG WORT Tracking code START --><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" id=\"metis-img-pixel\" src=\"https:\/\/vg08.met.vgwort.de\/na\/a31930a97d9b425399b6064529a9a3dc\" width=\"1\" height=\"1\" alt=\"\"\/><!-- VG WORT Tracking code END --><\/p><\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Posted on November 13, 2026 | I am currently reading The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker* with my book club. The book is about conflict in groups. That interested me, because most books about conflict and communication are about one-on-one situations. And as an internal martial artist myself, the title made me curious, too. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7080123,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11764],"tags":[2268,5475,1180,3463,59172,8162,17766,237789],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-7080122","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-alternative-medicine","tag-book","tag-conflict","tag-fight","tag-group","tag-reminded","tag-song","tag-taijiquan","tag-ting-jin"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>how a book about group conflict reminded me about Taijiquan - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/accountants4yourbusiness.co.uk\/?p=7080122\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"how a book about group conflict reminded me about Taijiquan - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Posted on November 13, 2026 | I am currently reading The Art of Fighting by Priya Parker* with my book club. 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